I'm Moving!

O.K. Maybe I'm not moving, but my blog is! Instead of posting here on blogger, I'll be posting from wordpress.com from here on out. Sharlee convinced me to make the jump, and I finally have. If you want to continue to stay updated with the Dietz family or check out what I'm up to on ModernDayMatriarch, then follow me on over to moderndaymatriarch.wordpress.com. I'm looking forward to seeing you there!

My Baby Girl Has Turned One!

My baby girl has turned one, and as predicted, this first year flew by in the blink of en eye. I'm afraid if the rest of the years go by as quickly as this on has, that I'll be old before I know it:) It has been a phenomenal year and I have loved every minute of it. Well, almost:) This morning we woke up to a wet bed because of Grace, then when I changed her she proceeded to go potty again before I got a diaper under her. THEN when I put her in the bath, she managed to go to the bathroom AGAIN. I have to admit, I was not a fan of THOSE moments. But the rest, I have loved:) Grace has grown and learned so much in these first 12 months. She can get just about anywhere in the house in 15 seconds as a result of her fine tuned crawling skills, and she's teetering (quite literally) on the edge of becoming a full fledged toddler. She is still a petite little thing, and her hair is coming in SLOWLY, so she still looks very much like a baby to me, and probably will for a while; so, for now, I'm referring to her as a baby. However, Enfamil would beg to differ. They've been sending me those "I am NOT a baby, I'm a toddler" pamphlets for about three months now. Each time I get one it makes me ache a little. I'm excited for the next phase of her life, but I'm also sad to see this one come to a close. Before Grace becomes a full fledged toddler, here area few fun facts about 1 year old Grace: **She is saying quite a few words now, although I'm not convinced she knows what she's saying when she says mom. Here are a few she definitely knows: Kkk-Cat, Da-Dad, Da-Dog, Hi, Neow-Meow (My daughter adores our cat Maynard, and he appears to be pretty fond of her as well, or at least tolerant.) **She love to wave "Hello" and "Goodbye" and although she hasn't mastered saying "bye" yet, she has the wave down anytime she hears it. **She gives huge, slobbery, kisses, that I love despite the drool. **And, she has started giving hugs. When I hold her, she'll randomly lean in, wrap her tiny arms around my neck and squeeze her body to mine, often patting my neck. It's too much. It warms my heart every time. In fact, I doubt it will ever get old. She has started to give them on command now too, which I love. **Her brother is still, pretty much, her favorite person:) She lights up when he walks into the room.

**She loves books. If I'm reading she will crawl over to me, her book in hand, and slap it down on my lap to read. Sometimes she just sits on the floor and reads out loud to herself in jibberish. **She LOVES being outside. She was this was as a newborn too. We used to bring the swing outside last summer, so she could enjoy the outdoors. If we're doing yard work, she'll play in her play yard outside. She loves to walk through the yard pushing her Minnie Mobile that my aunt gave her at her party or playing with Fenix's soccer ball.

**She still loves the bath. Anytime she is fussy she immediately drops the temper tantrum when her feet hit the water. We got her a pool for her birthday and a cute little bathing suite, so we're planning to spend lots of time in it this summer. As of now, she's been in it twice. She loves to crawl out of it and then back in. Of course, once she crawls back in she's covered in grass, which she then brings into the pool with her.

**She's a good little shopper. We have yet to have a temper tantrum in a store, although I know it's coming. **My daughter has my temper:( It's true. I suppose it's payback. My mother would laugh at it if she was here. In fact, I'm sure she's laughing up in heaven. **Her hair has gotten light! I'd say it's blonde, although recently you can start to see more red in it, so I'm curious what color it will be once it finally grows in. **She loves giving "bumps". She's been giving high fives, for a while, but Ken and I taught her bumps a few weeks ago, and she has taken off with it. **She is a good eater! You'd think she'd be chunkier than she is, because she loves food. Ken and I call her our little foodie:) She will try pretty much anything. Last night we ate spaghetti complete with peppers, onions, tomatoes, and zucchini and she ate it up! She also LOVES fruit, with blueberries probably being her favorite.

**She has just recently discovered the wonders of the kitchen, the pots and pans cupboard, the tupperware cupboard, and her favorite, the dishwasher:)

**I'm looking forward to spending the summer with her and beginning the adventure of the toddler years. This year has passed quickly, as I'm sure the next one will. Happy First Birthday baby girl! (P.S. I apologize that this post is not pretty. I really do know how paragraphs work, but blogger kept smushing all of my paragraphs together when I published this post. If anyone knows how to prevent that from happening, I would love to be enlightened:)

How Wonderful Life Is, Now You're In The World

Ken, Fenix, Grace, and I took a walk down to Dutch Brother's this morning. We were out of coffee filters, and I become all the more aware of my dependence on coffee. I just couldn't imagine starting my day without a cup of joe. It's more of a habitual addiction than an actual physical addiction. Nonetheless, we have a Dutch Bros at the entrance of our neighborhood. It's not my first choice, but beggars can't be choosers, right? And, this morning it did the trick. As we were walking back, we were talking about a new breakfast restaurant that has opened up down the street from me. For whatever reason, maybe it's because Mother's Day is next Sunday, I took a few moments to remember back to our last trip to eat breakfast as just Ken and I. It was Mother's Day last year, and I was incredibly pregnant, Grace was due on the 12th, and Mother's Day fell on the 8th. I wasn't officially a mother yet, but Ken and I planned to celebrate anyway. We usually wait to do something with Fenix, and Ken gives me the traditional gift of a hanging plant. (I used to give my mom a hanging plant each mother's day.) Our plan was to head out to breakfast and then stop by Fred Meyers to choose a plant. We were going to celebrate with dinner on Wednesday with Fenix, provided we weren't in the hospital awaiting the birth of Grace. There was a huge wait at Denny's for breakfast that morning. We spent a good chunk of time in the waiting area. At one point we caught an older couple smiling and commenting about my gigantic pregnant belly. They asked when I was due and congratulated us. They were strangers, but they were genuinely happy for us and excited for the journey which we were about to embark on. Little did we know, we'd begin that journey that very day. The memory makes me happy. In fact, it brings tears to my eyes. (I'm a sap like that.) But as I recounted the memory to Ken, starting with "Do you remember when we had breakfast last Mother's Day?", I cried. Last Mother's Day changed my life. My daughter was born. She was the greatest gift I could have ever asked for, and she came on Mother's Day. Her birth was going to be special no matter what, but having her arrive on Mother's Day made me feel like my mom was definitely watching and pulling some strings with the big guy upstairs.

I have been meaning to write Grace's birth story for a while now. I need to get it in her baby book, and I'd like to share it. So, what better time than now, when we are a week away from Mother's Day, and two days from her first birthday?

Dear Gracelyn,

I'm writing this to tell you the story of your birth, although before that I want you to know that I have loved you much longer than the time you've spent in this world, and I waited for you well over the nine months I was pregnant. Your dad and I wanted you long before we knew you were on your way. In some ways, it felt like I was patiently waiting for you for years. I knew some day you'd be here, and it was just a matter of waiting for the right time.

Your dad and I found out that I was pregnant on Labor Day. I took a test that morning, and a faint pink line appeared. I almost couldn't believe it. I had thought out the many creative ways I could tell your dad we were expecting, but then when it came down to it, I was so excited, and in such a state of disbelief, that I immediately had to share it with your dad. He too, was just as excited as I was. The doubters in us had to take one more test just to be sure though. We had plans that day to go to a family get together, so off we went. When we arrived home later that day, we took one more test, a digital one, to be sure. It read pregnant almost immediately. Our plan was to wait until 12 weeks to tell anyone, or at least until we went to the doctor's, but we couldn't hold our excitement, and soon the word spread like wild fire, to your Aunt Sharie, and Sharlee and both Amanda's. To your grandpa Jay, and and then after our appointment at six weeks, to your brother, to your Grandma and Grandpa Thayne, to your many Aunts and Uncles. At twelve weeks I told my students that I was expecting, and they were almost as excited as I was. They talked about your arrival daily. They brought you gifts, a crocheted blanket, hats, an outfit. They daydreamed about you with me. They say that pregnant woman glow, and I felt it. I was filled to the brim with excitement and love for you. I loved being pregnant with you. I would lie on the bed or the couch in the evenings and wait for your little kicks, your punches. When your dad got home, I'd press his hand up against my belly to wait. And, when we reached 37 weeks and it was O.K. for you to join us, and I got the go ahead to exercise, you daddy and I walked non-stop to bring on your arrival. We walked and we walked and we walked. We ate spicy food. I jumped up and down. For two weeks we tried. We walked so much I was perpetually sore. But, you had your own time frame in mind. You'd come on your own time table, and you did.

On Mother's Day, four days before your due date, your daddy and I got up and went out to breakfast. I remember feeling tired that day, like I could lounge around on the couch all day and be perfectly content. My body must have known that it would be the last day where I could do that. We went to Denny's because it was close, and we sat on the benches in the waiting area for an incredibly long time, as the many other people who were there ate their Mother's Day breakfast. While waiting, we met an older couple that wished us and you well. At this stage in the game, it was quite evident I was pregnant, and they struck up a conversation about when you were due and how much we'd love the journey we were about to embark on. After breakfast, our plan was to go and buy a hanging plant, which seems to be the traditional Mother's Day gift in our house, only I was exhausted and so we decided to spend a little time at home, curled up on the couch.

So, we went home and settled in for a day of relaxation and T.V. At around 11:30 I began to feel contractions. They didn't really hurt, and so I told your dad they were most likely Braxton Hicks because I had been having those since around 30 weeks. So, we continued to watch T.V. About an hour later, I began to time them. Everything I read said to wait until your contractions were about five minutes apart before heading to the hospital. My body is made kind of funny, and so at 20 weeks the doctor discovered something that made preterm labor, and quick labor, a bigger possibility for me than most (In fact, your mother had to muscle through 20 weeks of shots in her hips to make sure you'd stay put until you were healthy and your body was ready to join the world. You were worth it though:). Our doctor had said that if we wanted to come in once they were ten minutes apart we could.

Once the afternoon rolled around, we were at ten minutes, so we started to pack. By 5:30, they were five minutes a part, and we were on the road! I wasn't sure if I would be the type of person who would want to be touched and massaged while I was in labor. During those incredibly long, and somewhat frightening labor classes we took to be prepared for your arrival, the teacher introduced different massage techniques. I love massages, so I have to admit, a part of me was excited to be able to ask your Dad for massages non stop. I learned on the car ride to the hospital, when the contractions really began to be painful, that I was NOT the touchy/massage during labor kind of woman. Your dad was expecting the possibility of this, so he didn't have hurt feelings.

Once we arrived at the hospital, they registered us, and brought us to our room in triage. They checked my contractions and some other things, and decided (even though my contractions were about five minutes apart) that they couldn't admit us just yet. They suggested walking the hallways for an hour and they directed us where to go. So, we walked, and we walked, and we walked. And, as we walked, we slowly watched the minute hand on the clock tick by.

(Funny story: While we were walking, another couple was doing the same thing. You could tell the woman was on a mission! She had a determined look on her face and was huffing and puffing away, madly marching the hallway, while her husband stood by eating out of a bag of fast food! Oh, it made your dad and I laugh. Your dad did not stand by while I walked. In fact, he walked each step of the way, lending me his shoulder when a contraction came on, making me laugh when I grew impatient of walking and waiting.)

When we made it back to triage, it was nearly 8. My contractions were three minutes apart, I were dilated to a five, and we were on our way to being admitted!

I had planned to have pain meds. Never was there a time when I wanted a natural labor. If that's the route that you decide to go when it comes time to have your own children, I will support you 100%, but it was not the route for your mom. I had done my research early on and talked to my doctor to make sure you'd be safe and alert when you arrived (and you were!).

In triage they offered me an epideral, but I said no. The contractions weren't THAT bad, and for whatever reason, I decided to hold off (not sure what I was thinking:).Once we made it to our room, things moved really quickly. The doctor came in at 8:30/9 and checked everything out, broke my water without much wanring, and really jump started everything. I asked for the epideral then, and I'm glad that I did, because you were on your way. We waited for the anesthesiologist, and then for the medicine to take effect, and then we began to push. The epideral took the edge off, but I was still able to feel each contraction. Your daddy had a look of shock on his face from the time they broke my water on:) I'm not sure how long we pushed, but at one point we stopped to wait for the doctor, and then there you were!

They immediately laid you on my stomach while Daddy cut the chord. I was so enamored and taken by you, that I didn't even notice I was crying until your Daddy told me I was later. I remember as they handed you to me that I said, "But I'm not sure what to do!" and then you were in my arms and it clicked, the whole world falling into place.

They cleaned you up, and weighed and measured you. Six pounds and fourteen ounces, 20 inches long. Daddy held you for a bit, and your aunt, and then we made our way upstairs for the night.

I was so excited to have you. You daddy and I fell in love with you immediately. From the minute you were in my arms I couldn't imagine a world without you in it. In the birth class that we took, they suggested sending your baby to the nursery so that you could rest. In class, that made sense. Once you get home, there won't be nurses to help when you're tired. But when it came down to it, once you were there and in my arms, I couldn't let you out of my sight. During the time you were in the hospital you spent a total of maybe 2 and a half hours in the nursery. Once, on the night you were born, when you began to choke up amniotic fluid, and one other time, when I decided to take a nap. That last time, you were gone thirty minutes before I sent daddy back in to get you. I didn't want to waste a moment away from you.

I spent that first night holding you and staring down at your face. I had dreamed about that moment, never being able to clearly picture what you looked like, and then there you were, it all made sense, like I had been picturing you all along.

You changed our lives baby girl! You have made our lives so rich and so full! I am so happy and proud to be your mother. I'm so grateful that I was entrusted with you.

You turn one in two days. It has gone by so fast that it's frightening! How quickly will the next year go? The next 10? 20? I love you my Gracie Girl! I am looking forward to it all, every minute!

A Goodnight Kiss

This evening, as I was trying to put Grace down for bed, she sat up, placed her hands on both sides of my head, and then proceeded to give me a big, slobbery kiss.

It was absolutely priceless. She will give me kisses when I ask, but this is the first time she has done it all on her own, with no prompting from me. The hands on the side of my face was too much!

I love her. I wanted to jot the moment down quickly, so I wouldn't forget it.

(She is still up by the way, and it's 11! My daughter is a night owl, like her daddy.)

My Cat is a Good Cat...

Seriously.

My daughter is on him all the time.

Petting,

Pulling his tail,

Yanking fistfuls of hair,

LAYING ON HIM.

And yet he hasn't laid a finger on her.

Not so much as a hiss.

In fact, he doesn't even leave. She will pounce on him three, four times, and yet he still stays near her.

Strange.

I'd probably be hiding under the bed during daylight hours if I was him.

He's a good cat.

She Is a Strange One, But I Love Her!

My daughter LOVES the bath, LOVES it!

Cranky? Throw her in the bath!

Sleepy and want to keep her awake? Throw her in the bath?

Teething? Throw her in the bath and she is bound to forget about it.

This morning I gave her a bath, and rather than play with the dozen of toys that accompany my daughter at bath time, she was infatuated with the faucet. Not only was she licking it, and pressing her face against it, she was holding full on conversations with it in Grace talk.

I do not want her to grow up, but I honestly can't wait to see what she comes up with when playing make believe as a toddler!

Apps for the Tech Savvy Mom

I've been meaning to post this for a while. A friend of mine is considering buying a smartphone and so it reminded me that I had left this post on the back burner for a while.

My husband and I purchased smartphones this summer. I was incredibly resistant at first. Why do I need so much internet on my phone? I have a computer for that. Do I really need fingertip access to my e-mail? The answer was a very big no. However, Ken really wanted one, and we were lowering our minutes, so the data plan (with Ken's discount) had us breaking even with what were were initially paying. My husband is weird and won't buy himself things of that caliber unless I get something equal to it, so we took the plunge.

And,
I have to admit,
I love my smartphone.

It's so much more than having the internet and e-mail. (Although I use that too. I'm the queen of googling things I don't know, and my phone makes it that much easier.)

Over the last 9 months, I've stumbled over quite a few really useful apps that have made life, and motherhood a bit easier, and I thought I'd share my top five. (Did I mention their free? I have yet to buy an app.)

*ShopListFree

This is a grocery list app and I love it! I can add things that we need throughout the week and shop for them on our weekly trip to the store. I also always have my list on me at all times (and I won't loose it in the mess I call my purse), so if I stop at the store midweek, I know exactly what I need to pick up, without having to rack my brain too much. It allows you to check items off and get rid of them as you go. It also has different sections you can separate your items into, which makes getting in and out of the store quickly, really easy.

*MyFitnessPal

This app is a calorie and diet tracker. You can put in your weight and your goal weight, as well as how many pounds you want to lose and it calculates how many calories you should take in daily. You're also able to add in what you've done for exercise and it will subtract your calories burned from those you've consumed. At the end of each day, after you submit your entry, it computes what you'd weigh five weeks from that date if you continue to consume/burn that same amount of calories. I use this A LOT, not too say that it always keeps me inline when it comes to eating healthy and exercising, but it does put things into perspective.

*Cozi

This is a family calendar. Anyone in your family can sync to the same account and have easy access to dates and appointments that involve everyone. You can also set it to send texts or e-mail reminders. I just recently downloaded this app and haven't use it too much, although it's a great concept. I imagine if you have older kids with phones that this app could prove to be really helpful. For example, Fenix doesn't have a smartphone, but he can still get text reminders for events I have put into the calendar.

*LoveFoodHateWaste

This a great app for trying to figure out what to do with left over food. All you have to do is throw what you have left over into the "blender" and the app spits out recipes that incorporate those foods.

*BestBudget

One of my goals this year was to be better at writing and sticking to a budget. I think in categories. We spend this much on food, this much on gas, this much on utilities, etc. This app is organized in that same way. You create categories for how your money should be spent and saved. When you make a purchase, it subtracts it from the category you select. This app is easy and intuitive and runs without a hitch. The only thing I don't like is it doesn't synch to Ken's phone. I initially had an app called EEBA, where you had similar categories, called "envelopes", and that did synch. Unfortunately it was painfully and oddly slow.

*KitchenDial

This app converts measurements for you. It's quick, simple, and pretty handy.

Of course there are others I use as well, like Pinterest, the Idaho Statesman app (my smartphone has made it so that I am psychotically always up to date on local news), and WebMD, which I use to self diagnose myself with strange illness. But the ones above I can actually argue as being useful:)

In Need Of an HGTV Intervention

My big goal for spring break was to finally finish decorating my daughter's room. I've worked on it little by little over the break. I also wanted to finish a book, trim my roses, build a raised garden bed, and lay down for at least one nap a day with Grace (not to nap but to hold her). I've managed to accomplish all of the latter, but Grace's room is still in the works.

I probably should have had her room decorated before her arrival...you know, the whole nesting thing. In my defense her room has been set up for over a year now. It's the decorating thing that has had me at a standstill.

I can't make decisions in regards to decor.

It's too much pressure.

What if it looks terrible?

What if I have to do it over?

Do I need a theme?

Should I paint her walls a different color?

There are too many ideas to choose from, how the heck can I choose?

You get the idea. Many a day did I pray for an HGTV intervention that unfortunately never came.

So, after much debate, this is the direction I'm going in:

I refuse to paint her entire room...at least for now. That was too big of a decision to make:)

Her room will be sans theme. I just couldn't narrow it down to just one thing, unless you count eclectic as a theme. There are certain things in her room I can't part with just yet, which makes giving her room a theme nearly impossible.

For example, I have a collage frame with pics of my mom, Grace's aunts, and myself all wearing the same hideous cowboy outfit...and guess what? I'm going to make Grace take the same picture and add it to the frame. Yup, I'm THAT cheesy!

I have this HUGE teddy bear Ken gave me our first Christmas that sits in the corner of Grace's room and makes a great pillow for sitting and reading.

My belly cast from when I was pregnant.

Numerous photos and a beautiful poem Elise, Sharlee's mother wrote for Grace.

And last, a cross-stitch my mom made ages ago. Yes, that's right folks, a cross stitch.

To add to the hot mess of decor I already have going, I'm building one of those cubbyhole shelf things for her toys, books, stuffed animals, etc. (By building I mean all the pieces are coming out of a box from target. I didn't mean to scare you!)

I'm painting a cherry blossom-ish tree in her "reading corner".

Putting up forward facing book shelves, as well as repainting some old shelves from my mom's house.

Phew! It's a lot. A week is plenty of time to get that all done in, but truth be told, a baby at your feet slows down the process a tad.

At this point I have made 2.5 of the four forward facing book shelves. Which means, I have a very busy weekend ahead of me.

So, if by chance you see Monica Pederson,





or any of her HGTV cohorts just hanging out with nothing to do, please send them my way.

Tricks of the Trade

Grace is just a tad over ten months old, so I definitely can't claim to be an expert on motherhood (but really, can anyone?). I have however, learned a few tricks of the trade that I thought I'd share.

These are just a few things I've learned in the last ten months that have made mommy-hood go a bit smoother.

*Nurse if you can. This isn't really a tip or a trick, but once you get the hang of it, it makes life much easier (and more affordable). We all know it's what's best for baby, but there are some selfish perks as well. It's significantly cheaper than formula. Grace still nurses and I pump, but we supplement with formula when I work. Even THAT is expensive, so I can only imagine how spendy it would be if she had formula all the time. On top of that, it allows your body to burn extra calories, without the effort of exercise. I gained 35 pounds in my pregnancy. I've lost all but five. (My goal is to be back to my prepregnancy weight by Grace's birthday.) I know there are woman who dropped all their weight within a few months, but I'm just not one of those, and if I can drop these last five pounds by May 8th, I'll be content. I have only recently (as in the last few weeks) started exercising on a regular basis again. (I know, I'm not proud of this fact, but baby and work have kept me busy.) The majority of my weight has come off without much effort on my part, and I attribute that to extra calories burned because of nursing. (Now, I have a feeling these last five pounds are planning to stick around until I work them off. Which is a completely different story/post.)

*BRAT-Bananas-Rice-Applesauce-Toast. Works great for a baby's upset belly (can we say explosive diaper?). Anytime Grace's belly is having issues, or even my step-son's for that matter, we serve up at least one of these four.

*Cranberry juice helps you rid yourself of excess water weight. How is this a mom tip you're wondering? When I came home from the hospital I insisted on stepping on the scale. My daughter weighed 6 pounds and 12 ounces, but I had only lost six! I don't remember going into the hospital bloated, but I definitely came out that way. My legs were like balloons. I blame it on the meds they give you right after birth to help your uterus shrink. It took almost two weeks for my legs to return to normal, and during that time I drank a lot of cranberry juice, and it helped. Plus, it's just plain delicious!

*I've been a pretty lucky mom when it's come to my daughter teething. However, when her teeth are bothering her (and sometimes just when I need to quickly clean the kitchen), I hand Grace a frozen washcloth with applesauce in the middle. I make the washcloth ahead of time by wetting the washcloth, spreading applesauce in the center, twisting, and then tossing into a plastic bag and into the freezer. When Grace's mouth is hurting her, I hand her the frozen washcloth. The cool cloth feels good against her teeth, and she also gets a sweet and healthy treat as the cloth begins to thaw out.



*If you're planning to make your own baby food (also cheaper than buying already prepped baby food), make it ahead and freeze it. This is what we've done with the majority of Grace's food. At first I was trying to make it almost daily, and I just couldn't keep up. By the time we get home on a typical school day, we only have a few hours until bed, so I started making the majority of Grace's food on the weekend and then freezing it in ice cube trays. In a typical ice cube tray, a cube equals one ounce. This makes it super easy to determine how much food to heat up for baby. When it comes to using frozen fruit and veggies, you can unfreeze it, cook it, purée it, and then freeze it one more time.

We just recently started freezing chicken. I cooked a chicken breast up, stuck it in the food processor, and then froze it in a freezer bag. If we end up eating something for dinner that Grace can't, I just pour a little puréed chicken in with her veggies and heat it up.

*Always pack an extra set of baby clothes in your diaper bag (above picture illustrates what happens when you don't:), if not two. Also, ALWAYS keep an extra diaper and wipes in your car. ALWAYS. You'll never know when you'll need it.

*Another thing you should always pack is a plastic bag.

Just recently we had an incident where I did not have extra clothes, and I have learned my lesson. I took Fenix to his first soccer practice last week. It had been a super long day. We had been in the car the majority of the afternoon. As I was walking up to introduce myself to Fenix's coach, I noticed that Grace was beginning to smell pretty rank. I didn't dare look down. Instead I quickly introduced myself to Fenix's coach (and prayed he didn't mistake the wretched smell as me) and booked it back to my car, only to discover that Grace had completely (COMPLETELY) blown out her diaper. I changed her in the back seat, and she had to ride home in just her diaper. Luckily I didn't have anywhere pressing that I needed to be. Most public places frown upon a semi naked baby:)

Well, there's a few tricks I've learned a long the way. I'm sure there are many I didn't think to mention, and quite a few more that I'll learn, and hopefully remember to share:)

I'm not much for ending on a question, but if you're a mom and you have any other tips you feel like sharing, please leave a comment, or blog it and leave the link. I'd love to add a few more to my mom bag of tricks!:)

Walk This Way

Grace and I took a stroll today to check out the new walking path they are putting in behind our neighborhood. It doesn't look like much right now, but we are psyched for it to be finished, so we can reap the benefits. As of right now, our walks consist of a plethora of turns down the various streets in our neighborhood, and we are looking forward to the change in scenery.

We decided to trudge through some of the path before they lay any cement or gravel down. Possibly not the brightest idea after a day of rain. Our thirty minute walk turned into sixty, as I attempted to walk as much mud off the tires of Grace's stroller as I could.

The walk felt good, and the prospect of a new walking path had me fantasizing about summer.

Summer walks in the morning before it gets too hot.

Ken making dinner on the grill.

Evenings spent on the patio with a glass of white wine.

Mornings spent on the patio with a cup of coffee and a good book (can you tell I love our patio?)


Needless to say, I am ready for summer.

So, here's to the new walking path and the quick arrival of summer.

"You're hair looks really flat today, Mrs. Dietz."

"Um...O.K. Thanks for that."

"I didn't meant it in a bad way. I just mean it's not as poofy as it normally is."


I couldn't decide which part was the insult:)

March Already?!?!

After writing that huge recap of how my family spent 2011, I made a blogging vow that I would never do that again. Or, that I'd at least make it easier by posting monthly updates. Well, January came and went, and then February sped in and out just as quickly, and now here we are at March 4th, and I have yet to post an update. So, here goes.




*The beginning of January seems so long ago at this point, that it seems weird to be blogging about it now, but I'm going to:)

We rang in out new year with our friends Alan and Tara. We got the boy and the girl looking spiffy, and took off for a night of games, good food, and superb company:)





*Grace started crawling at the start of January. She had been close to crawling for the last month, if not longer, and finally it just clicked. She has been on the move ever since, and has definitely been giving us a run for our money. Her favorites are crawling for dog toys, bowls, bones, etc. If it belongs to the dog, she wants it.

She also started pulling herself up to a standing position within a few days of crawling for the first time. It looks like our next big adventure is walking, and I have some mixed emotions about it. Doesn't it seem like I was just recently posting newborn photos of her? Now, she's crawling and on her way to walking?! How did that happen? I was told by many that it would go by too fast, but I did not even realize what that meant until she was here.

*Grace turned 8 months old on the 8th of January...






and then 9 months in February. (Four more days and she'll be ten months!) Taking the monthly photo continues to be a trial:)



*We took the kids to the Boise Aquarium and made them try on horribly embarrassing costumes (and prayed that no one who tried them on before had lice).



*We celebrated my birthday by having dinner with friends and a game night. The game night didn't end up being much of a game night, but we had a good time nonetheless. I got next to no pictures of the entire night, with the exception of this one:



My husband makes a pretty good cherry chip cake. Ken claims it's because he used the Kitchenaid, which just makes me laugh because it was a boxed cake:)

Let's see, what else have we been up to?

*Grace has started feeding herself and using a sippy cup.






Of course all the finger food has meant extra baths. Somehow she has the ability to get food EVERYWHERE! In her hair, behind her ear, mixed into her eyebrows, in her diaper, behind her knees...EVERYWHERE!

Lucky for us, she loves the bath. I'm looking forward to taking her swimming a lot this summer!

*Fenix went skiing for the first time on a class trip and had a blast. I have to admit I was nervous for him. He tends to overthink stuff and freak himself out, and I was worried he would get there and then get scared. When I told him skiing might be be kind of scary, he replied, "But I can always just ride the ski lift." I had to explain that when you ride the ski lift you have to then ski back down. He did great though!

*Fenix also started doing some weekly chores and earning an allowance. He's been obsessing over a game called "Mindcraft", and is hoping to save up his allowance so that he can buy it. I attempted to take a picture of him on payday, but he was having none of it, so you'll just have to settle for this:



*Grace went to the park and played on the swings for the first time and LOVED it!






*Grace and I had lots of failed attempts at indoor photo shoots. The whole crawling thing makes our limited space in the living room a little tricky.



*I did, however, gather a bunch of really cute photos of Grace and Fenix.

Here are a few of my favorites:










That's pretty much the gist of the start of our year. We're looking forward to March and spring break, and more than that, the arrival of summer. If these next few months go by as quickly as the last, then it will be here in no time!

Until Then...

I have plans to post sometime this weekend, after I pull pictures for the last two months off our camera. Until then, I thought I'd at least post this picture for those of you going through Grace withdrawals...all two of you that read my blog on a regular basis that is:)

I had bills to pay today and so I fed Grace some sweet potato pancake and got to work. A few bills and mini pancakes later, I looked over at Grace to find this, and I couldn't resist taking a picture and posting it quickly.

Is It Just Me?

So, I have this (not so secret) hope that my daughter will grow up to have curly hair. Sometimes I deliberately fluff it up (as much as it can be fluffed for being barely there), and tell myself it's curly. Or, I just take photos of it after it's dried from the bath... (See pic below.)

It's not just me, right? There does appear to be a slight curl to it, right? Be honest now.

In truth, I will love my daughter's hair curls or no curls, but this week my incredibly thoughtful husband brought Grace to see me at lunch. (I say he's incredibly thoughtful because he already put in his 40 hours for the week. He worked 4 long and late days, and then on his day off drove 40 minutes both ways so that he and Grace could spend approximately 30 minutes with me. Most of that time was shared with middle school girls and a few fellows popping in to fawn over the baby. He's a good man. What can I say, I got lucky).

Now, where was I going with this? Oh yeah, one of my 7th grade girls came in, took one look at Grace, and exclaimed, "She looks nothing like you Mrs. Dietz! She looks so much like your husband!". This is true. Everyone, including me, can see Ken in Grace. Most see Fenix as well (with the exception of his grandma on his mother's side, who asked to hold her at one of Fenix's soccer games (a bit awkward...), and then very loudly announced, while holding her an arms distance away, "Well, you look NOTHING like you're brother!". Aren't split homes fun for everyone?:)

Very rarely do I get that Grace looks like me, so I'm thinking that the curly hair is our last saving grace (saving grace...ha, do you see what I did there?).

I'd like for Grace to inherit more than my temper and lack of patience.

So, we'll see.

What do you think?

Look closely.

Is it just me, or do you see a hint of curl???

Your Child May Be an Insomniac If...

Your child may be an insomniac if you wake up at one a.m. to her sitting up in between you and your husband, clapping and grinning to beat the band.

Or, if she then refuses to go to bed until she gets at least thirty minutes of playtime in her pack n play.

Or, if at nine months, she still needs a three A.M. snack...and then another at 6.

Or,

possibly it's just time for her to start sleeping in her room, REALLY sleeping in her own room.

Transitioning my daughter from sleeping in our room, (and to be honest) a lot of times our bed, has been trying, on both her and me.

She sleeps better and longer in our bed than in her room. Or at least that's what I've been telling myself. I'm sure once she gets settled into a rhythm of sleeping in her own crib, the three a.m. feedings will most likely cease. Who wouldn't want a midnight snack with a 24 hour restaurant located right beside them?

As for her one a.m. parties in her playpen? Well, we'll have to see.

I think my resistance to moving her into her own room stems, in part, from the fact that I work. As it is, I feel like I lose too much time with her throughout the week. I leave a little before seven on school days and don't pick her up until between 4:30 and 5:00, placing us at home 30 minutes after. In the three to four hours we have between coming home and her bedtime, she nurses twice, eats dinner, and often takes a bath. There just isn't enough time. I am all too aware of how quickly she is growing up. Cuddling and falling asleep with her on the couch, caving in and pulling her into our bed, gives me just a little more time with her; time that I need and that I'm sure I'll miss down the road.

If there is one thing I've learned since becoming a parent, it's that everyone's family, and their approach to parenting is different. Books, blogs, websites, other parents are all helpful, but ultimately you do what works for you and your child.

Before Grace was born I had all of these goals and ideas from nursing for the first year to how much she'd get to use her binkie; from the introduction to solid foods to sippie cups, to what foods we would feed her to when she'd sleep in her own room, etc.

There are a few Ken and I felt more strongly about than others.

We are right on track to meeting my goal of nursing for a year. It hasn't been easy. In fact, those first six weeks were really tough. There were lots of tears and frustrations, and I'm not just talking about my daughter. We managed to muscle our way through and I'm really proud of that.

Grace only gets the binkie at nap and night time, which was our goal from the beginning. We didn't want her to be dependent upon her binkie, so we waited to give it to her until she was a month old, and then we did so with hesitancy. We wanted to make sure we didn't use it as a crutch. Hopefully this summer we'll be able to wean her away from using it at all. She hasn't been much of a binkie girl, so I'm hoping that will be a smooth transition.

We had initially planned to move Grace from our room at three months, but once three months hit, it felt too soon, so we moved our goal back to six months. Well, six months came and went, and now here we are at nine months, and Grace still sleeps the bulk of her nights with us. We've tried transitioning her here and there, but have always found ourselves pulling her back into our bed.

There has to be a middle ground somewhere, so we'll start with baby steps.

In fact, I think we'll start tonight.

It may take us a little longer to get there than anticipated, but I think that's O.K.

We'll get there.

The truth of the matter is, once she is sleeping in her bed, I'm going to miss our midnight play dates.

A Little Saturday Shopping

Grace, Daddy, and I did a little Saturday shopping yesterday.

Grace was exhausted by the end. I couldn't resist posting the picture. I love her tired half smile.

Just Because...

Full!

These last two weeks have been incredibly full with parent teacher conferences and such. I'm looking forward to a three day weekend and the opportunity to catch up on some Grace and husband time, along with getting a few things done around the house, and maybe, just maybe, updating this thing. Do the entries I've written in my head count?

My Mother Bought Me Coffee Yesterday Morning

My mother bought me coffee yesterday morning.

You're probably wondering how that's even possible, given the fact that my mom has been gone two and a half years now, so I'll have to start a little farther back.

When my mom passed I kept nearly everything.

The last time she sat in my car was when I took her to a doctor's appointment a day before she was admitted into the hospital. She had a pink sweater that she used to wear and when she got out of my car that day, she left it hanging over the back of my passenger seat. It's still there. I haven't had the heart to remove it.

Her china hutch is sitting in our house, looking nearly identical to how it was in hers. Eventually we will take out my Grandparent's old things that she had in it and add our own. We're just taking our time.

I have old cards and old notes she wrote me.

I have a "gift card holder" that she gave Ken and I one year on my dresser (yup, that's right, a gift card holder:).

Her old bible.

Photo albums.

A bacon pan (which actually is NOT a bacon pan, but I convinced Ken it was. It's actually a grill pan that my mom used exclusively for cooking bacon. Who would have known it was actually a grill pan?)

Glass corn on the cob holders....we've never used these. In all honesty, who uses fancy glass corn on the cob holders?

A fur coat.

A really old/ugly, white and gold ice chest used to place your bottle of wine in. In fact, I'm pretty sure we have two of these.

We could decorate our house and our neighbors in Christmas decor from my mother's house.

Grace has clothes of my mother's in her closet, and then we have a tub in the garage.

Her old hairbrush. (I couldn't bring myself to toss it or ANYTHING the day we left the hospital. If I could't bring her with me, I was certainly going to bring all of her belongings, and boy did I.)

We cannot park in our garage. We are lucky if we can walk through it. Each time I make it from one end to the other I feel like a survivor of some sort. I'm afraid to let our cat out there out of fear he will get squished by a falling box, or random weird appliance that my mother had.

You probably get the point by now.

After losing my mother, I had a hard time getting rid of ANYTHING. I think this is probably pretty normal for anyone going through the process of grief. Somehow those items (gift card holder and fur coat included) were a part of my mom, and I couldn't let that go quite yet.

One of the many things I kept was a small brown purse my mom would take with her when she didn't want to take something bigger.

She had brought this purse with her to the hospital and in it had packed lipstick, her insurance card, her driver's license, and then a little cash. (P.S. I love my mother for packing lipstick to the hospital.) When we left the hospital after she passed, I took her purse with me. It sits in a drawer in my dresser, and I haven't so much as touched it since I brought it home. It had three dollars in it, and those dollars have sat untouched for the last two and a half years.

I knew they were there, but I could not touch them. They were my mother's. It felt weird to use them, like I was stealing almost.

This last week was kind of rough. Remember my blog post about New Year's Resolutions?

One of my resolutions was to stress less. Well, this last week I failed miserably on that one, and by Friday I was ready for the week to be done, ready to get some perspective and change my attitude, and ready for a nice, sugar filled, calorie laden, cup of coffee.

Unfortunately for me, one of my other resolutions was to budget better (we are doing better in this department, but not as good as I'd like), so I refused to put a cup of coffee on our debit card (we take out spending money in cash each week so it's easier to keep track of, and in addition, things were tight last week, and I didn't want to start out this week on the wrong foot.)

So, I dug my mom's purse out. I felt the lipstick, and looked at my mom's driver's license, and I spent the three dollars that were in it on a much needed cup of coffee.

I felt bad. Like I said, it almost felt like stealing. To be honest, I feel kind of bad blogging about it. I'm a little afraid I'll be judged for using that three dollars on a cup of a coffee, but had my mother been here, I'm pretty sure she would have been the one to buy me that cup of coffee after a bad week...or even after a good week, or for no real reason at all; because mom's do that. Here I go sounding incredibly selfish again, but sometimes I miss that. I miss my mom buying me a cup of coffee or buying my breakfast at work (remember we worked together for years). I miss going shopping with her and splitting a treat with her on the car ride home. I miss that feeling of being taken care of. Now of course that's not the only thing I miss. I miss her MY MOM bottom line, but I also have moments where I miss being a child, who is still being taken care of, even just in small ways, by her mom.






Spending that three dollars did help me gain a little perspective though.

Those three dollars are not my mom.

The fur coat and the glass corn on the cob holders are not my mom.

The boxes upon boxes in our garage are not my mom.

My mom is in my heart (yup, here I go being corny).

My mom is in my memory.

In me.

In my relationship with my daughter.

She is not in a box or an article of clothing.

Those things may remind me of her, but they are not her.

I do not have to keep every shred of her existence.

My mother most definitely existed.

I am living proof of her impact on this world.

I hold her in my memory and in my heart.

I love her now just as much as I did when she was here.

Our relationship still exists.

She is still a part of my life.

I don't need a garage full of boxes to prove that or to remind me of that.

All I need is to look in the mirror,
to remember her,
to talk about her.

This summer I will clean out my garage. It will be hard and I will still keep some articles of clothing. I will still keep the gift card holder (because it still makes me laugh.) I will still keep a lot of things.

But, I won't keep it all.

I don't need to, to keep my mother.

My mother will always be a part of me.

On the Move

It has been such a long day.

I stayed up way too late last night playing around with photoshop.

I stayed later than I planned at the school, so that my gradebook would be up to date.

Then when Grace and I got home, we went into work mode; finishing up weekend laundry and prepping her food for the week. (We make most of her food ourselves, especially her veggies. I've been making a ton at the start of the week and freezing the rest in ice cube trays, so that all I have to do is heat it up or pack it for Cara's. I could probably dedicate an entire post to this. The ice tray thing was such a great idea! Thank youhttp://wholesomebabyfood.momtastic.com/index.htm).

I did not wholeheartedly sit down until around 8:15 tonight.

I had planned to fill my mind up with some reality t.v. garbage for an hour or two (The Bachelor...yeah, I know.) Grace has had other plans though.

You would think she would be tired. She is on the go non stop, but for the last 30 minutes she has repeatedly crawled across our rec room, up our stairs (and by stairs, I mean two stairs), through our living room and then booked it to the kitchen.

She is on a mission.

Did I mention I am exhausted? Super duper tired? And ready for some mind numbing reality t.v.?

Well, I am; but to be honest, not much gets better than this.

My daughter is too much.

She cracks me up.

I would maybe grow tired of this if it weren't for her absolute zeal to get wherever it is she thinks she is going, or the over the shoulder, "Ha, Ha, Mom. Try and get me," grin she's been giving me.

Or the fact that every time I set her back in the rec room and she takes off again, she laughs at herself.

I love her.

I love her so much, there's no way I can describe it.





(You will have to excuse the bad quality photo...blame it on a combination of a moving baby and a camera phone.)



The couch can wait.

Ben (this season's bachelor) can most definitely wait.

I've got a baby to chase down,

and a pretty cute one at that.

Source: imgfave.com via Misty on Pinterest

The day my mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, she wasn't officially diagnosed. The official diagnoses wouldn't come until after they did a biopsy of what they thought was the tumor. But we knew right away that it was cancer; the doctors, my mother, me.

After receiving the news from her doctor, my mother called me at school. She waited until school had let out, and then she told me to come home. She didn't tell me why, and she didn't have to.

I knew.

I cleaned my desk and packed my school work into my bag in a matter of seconds.

I drove the free way in silence and record time; the whole time my gut knew what my head and my heart wasn't ready to hear.

When I walked in the front door of my mother's house, she was sitting in her bathrobe on the couch.

"They think I have pancreatic cancer..."

"But you can't. I haven't even had babies yet."

"I know, that was my first thought."

I disappeared into the pillows on the couch and my mom's arms, and we cried. We cried for a long time, and then the rest gets blurry.

Phone calls were made.

My mom called our manager at St. Lukes,

She called friends,

I called my husband.

Do you remember how I explained my freak out over the possibility of hepatitis? I made Ken come home from work then. But the day my mom was diagnosed, I didn't ask him to come home.

I needed to be with my mom,

and then

I needed to be alone.

I sat on her back porch with her for hours.

We didn't eat a thing that day.

At one point we came in from the porch renewed. Working at a hospital had its advantages and they had pulled strings to get my mother in that Friday to perform a procedure on her bile duct (the reason her urine was so dark). Once that was up and running, they could begin treatment. They had set her up with a surgeon to see if the tumor could be removed, and they got her in with the best oncologist they could find.

I remember her quoting her friend Claire: Be ready for the fight of your life Caren.

And we were.

But we were beat before we even had a chance.

And, I knew it.

I knew it deep down in my gut the minute I got the phone call to come home that day.

I left at nine that night, which to be honest is something that haunts me still. My mom slept alone in her bed that night, and I should have stayed with her.

She should have had someone to reach a hand out to and hold that night.

But I had to get home. I had to break down alone in my own room. I had to look up statistics and patron saints and stories of survival (which were few and far between). I had to cry until I couldn't breath, and I had to do it where she couldn't see me.

And then that night, when I couldn't sleep, I had to call her, and I had to hear her voice pick up on the other line. I had to tell her I loved her and hear her tell me she loved me, the whole time knowing deep down, that there would come a night when I couldn't pick up the phone at 11 o'clock at night, just to hear her voice.

I hoped with all of my heart that my mom would beat cancer. I prayed non stop. I asked friends to pray. I tried to think positively. I looked up the patron Saint of miracles (Saint Anthony), I brought my rosary, something I hadn't used in years, to the hospital.

But in the end, none of that really mattered.

My mother's diagnoses is the first time in my life when I have been faced with something I had no control over; my life marked.

Bah Humbug!

Today has been one of those days.

I attempted to take photos of Grace on the portable floor I bought, but she was having none of it.

Our horribly tempered min pin ran across out laptop this summer and knocked two keys off. It really hasn't made much of a difference at all because there has been a little plastic thingy to press on instead of a key. Somehow the plastic thingy has gone missing...never to return, and so now pressing the I key is actually somewhat of a labor.

It's three and I feel like I've accomplished nothing but becoming cranky.

I need to change my perspective...or something. Or possibly invest in some Riesling (it just took me 15 seconds just to type the word because of our missing I key...15 seconds again...)

I is in a lot of words by the way.

Mommy's Muse

So, I bought a digital SLR back in September, in the hopes to get back into the hobby of photography like I was in high school. I haven't had the time that I'd like to take and edit photos, however, I have really enjoyed the little time I have had. I'm just learning the ins and outs of my camera and of photoshop. It's definitely a work in progress. Sharlee and Zach let me experiment with them this last fall, and Grace, of course, has been a phenomenal muse! We managed to have a make shift photo shoot this weekend. I'm not done editing, but here are the first few shots.

I Have Decided To Stick With Love...

"I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear."-Martin Luther King Jr.


Just something to think about...

Happy MLK Day!

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

Confession 1:

If we had the money, I would totally hire someone to come in once a week and clean our house. I am not a fan of deep cleaning whatsoever, or dishes, or laundry, or vacumming the couches especially. (This is probably my least favorite thing to do, which is why in my next life I am only having one animal and it's not going to shed...or it's going to be a fish.) My house is currently a disaster area and every weekend I recommit myself to being a better homemaker during the week, so my weekends aren't so...messy.
(Don't worry, I DO clean, my house won't be a disaster area past today, I will just hate every moment of it:)

Confession 2:

I become more and more like my mother every day. I thought I would mind, but I don't. I do however, feel a bit sorry for my husband.

Here's one example: I have developed total plane anxiety. Anytime we fly I think we are going to die and I spend about twenty minutes at the start of each flight nervously praying. My mother wasn't necessarily this way on planes, but anytime we traveled she was excessively anxious.

Confession 3:

Being a parent to a child in split home is hard (sorry Sharlee, I hope I'm not falling to that category of parents you dislike, it's the best word to describe it though.) You are held to abnormally high standards, superhuman standards. There's no room for error, because you are constantly scrutinized. I'm sure this isn't true for all parents of a child that lives in a split home, but I think it may be for most. Ken and I definitely aren't innocent of this either. In addition there is no easy decision. All decisions have to be ran through another party, who leads a different life with different obligations. Time and holidays are divided. You cross your fingers that birthdays and other events fall on the right day. You learn to accept that your child is being raised with a different set of rules, values, and guidelines depending on his home. There are laws and guidelines and politics that typical parents don't have to deal with. And, I'm just the step-parent, so I can only imagine how it is for my husband and Fenix's mom, let alone Fenix. At this point he seems to handle it all really well, and I hope it continues that way as he gets older. Despite it being difficult at times, I wouldn't trade my relationship with Fenix for anything in the world. I have been BLESSED by his presence in my life.

Confession 4: I love to bake. In fact, that's the reason for this post actually. Ken and Fenix bought me some really nice stainless steal measuring cups for Christmas. I used them once over the break to make some really deliscious cookies (which I sent to Ken's work, because I couldn't trust myself to keep them in the house), and I'd really like to use them again, however, I made a New Year's resolution to lose the last of this baby weight, and I have a feeling if I bake, it's going to be even harder to make that happen. (I have pretty much no self control. Therefore baked goods are not even allowed in our house for the time being.) So, instead of baking and gaining five pounds, I thought I'd share a recipe for Pumpkin Chocolate Chip cookies that I made over the holidays. They are phenomenal! Really! And, I'm not even a huge fan of pumpkin. So, if you're in the mood to bake, and you aren't all pumpkined out from the holidays/actually have a some self control, this is a really good recipe to try.



(Just to you know, I stole this picture from allrecipes.com.)

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

Ingredients
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
1 cup white sugar
1 cup light brown sugar
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup canned pumpkin puree
3 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
2 cups (12-ounce bag) milk chocolate chips, not semisweet
Nonstick cooking spray or parchment paper

What you need to do:

Using a mixer, beat the butter until smooth.

Then, beat in the white and brown sugars. You'll want to add a little at a time, until the mixture is light and fluffy.

Next, beat in the eggs 1 at a time, and mix in the vanilla and pumpkin puree.

In a separate bowl, whisk together the flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and cloves. Slowly beat the flour mixture into the batter.

Last, toss in your chocolate chips.

Scoop the cookie dough (you'll want about a tablespoon) onto the prepared cookie sheets and bake for 15 to 20 minutes, or until the cookies are browned around the edges.

Remove the cookie sheets from the oven and let them rest for around 2 minutes. (I'm not sure, but it seems like if I leave the cookies on the cookie sheet for a lot longer, that get flat.

Take the cookies off and cool them on a wire rack.



(This picture has NOTHING to do with this post, but she is so stinkin' cute, I couldn't resist.)